What to Expect...

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When the movie What to Expect When You're Expecting first came to the theaters, Phil and I vowed we would not be seeing it.  It was in the middle of my cancer stuff and the moratorium on my uterus.  We weren't sure if we were ever going to be able to have kids and seeing that movie just seemed like a means of torture.

Of course everyone and their dog saw the movie.  Or at least it seemed like it.  And they RAVED about it.  So after I found out I was pregnant and the movie came out on DVD, I figured I could probably watch it.  But Phil and I never got around to it.  I almost watched it with some girlfriends once, but we ended up sitting around and talking the whole time instead (always the best alternative).

Last week, I noticed the movie was on Netflix and figured this was a sign that I should finally watch it (since I wouldn't have to actually GO rent it).  After some Mexican food take-out and a nap yesterday, Phil and I sat down and watched the whole thing.

I hated it.

It was like watching my every fear played out on the screen before me.

-  The couple who takes 2 years to get pregnant (sounds familiar) finally gets pregnant only to find a relative who got pregnant SUPER easy and has the easiest of pregnancies ends up having to have a C-section and almost dies.  Like I needed that in my head right before I give birth.

-  The couple adopting who struggle with the idea of getting ready for the baby.  And then when they finally go get him, J. Lo says, "I've been waiting for you."  Pretty much exactly how I feel about this baby who is refusing to be born.  Like at 38 weeks pregnant I needed a reason to cry?

-  The couple who has a miscarriage.  Thankfully I have not experienced having a miscarriage.  But I know people how have and it was almost a debilitating fear I had for the first 13 weeks of my pregnancy.  I honestly stopped exercising because I was afraid I was going to do something wrong.

The only redeeming aspect of the whole movie was the Dad's Club.

I'm not sure that people who haven't experienced challenges when it comes to having babies can ever fully understand the kind of pain and loss that comes with it.  And even though we are lucky enough to get to experience a normal, healthy pregnancy, it will never erase all the struggle that came with getting here.  Personally, I think it has made me a more compassionate and empathetic person.  And there is no doubt in my mind that it has changed the way I will parent my kids.

But I hated the movie.  Just thought I'd share.