Happy Birthday Braxton!!

I can't believe you are 2 years old already!!  You are my favorite Asian nephew.  :)  Even if you won't hug me unless I bribe you.  I bought you a present, that should get me at least a hug, right?

Happy Birthday!

Ferris Wheels, Funnel Cakes, and Fried Food - The Fair

I've been so stressed out for, oh, probably the last month and a half and it is really starting to take its toll on me.  I'm sure this is a surprise to no one.  But I think the combination of new thyroid hormones, Thyrogen shots, extreme stress and a weird diet have done me in.  I'm tired and get grumpy pretty easily.  Plus my appetite likes to play a little game of being non-existant to totally raging.

Before your mind goes there... no... I'm not pregnant.  What proof?  How about that wonderful blood pregnancy test I was forced to have that probably won't be covered by my insurance last week before my iodine dose and scan that resulted in a lovely arm bruise?  Will that work?  Ok. 

And I think if my insurance tries to not pay for this one, I am going to call and cry gender discrimination.  This will be the 3rd pregnancy test I have HAD to have this year for my cancer stuff.  The first two were urine tests that cost me $25 that were not covered by insurance.  For $25 I could have walked to the Walgreen's across the street and bought a box of 3 for less than $25.  Not to mention that my almost 2 years of trying unsuccessfully to get pregnant makes being forced to have a pregnancy test kind of an insult.  But I think if a doctor is making me take the test, my insurance should cover it.  If I were a man, I wouldn't even have to have the stupid test.

Did I mention I get grumpy easily?

The point is... I'm tired.  If you couldn't tell from my pictures, we went to the fair this last weekend.  And we did everything you are supposed to do at the state fair:  Saw the animals.  Ate fried food.  Walked through the exhibit halls to see the crap they are selling.  Get yelled at by a salesperson (more on that later).  Eat fried food.  Ride some rides.  Have a scone (or two).  Watch the boys get into a giant hamster wheel.

{Pictures are kind of blurry, but whatever.  You get the idea}

Why didn't I think of this?  It's GENIUS!  Another lost opportunity.

David didn't get his face painted like the last two years.  And he didn't say anything super cute or hilarious either.  But he did ride one of the big people rides and loved it.

Jeffrey and I rode the ride too.  But we didn't enjoy it as much as the girl next to us.

But he couldn't go on all the rides.  He was pretty bummed he couldn't go on the giant swings I made Jeffrey go on with me.

{Phil took this picture and I love it.  So cute}

Next year, David.  You'll be big enough next year.  Then your problem will be your dad letting you go on the rides.  :)

Think Happy Thoughts

I've been having a rough couple of days.  I absolutely HATE waiting for test results.  Plus I found out that a baby (21 month old) we know (distantly, but still) has a very rare (but supposedly very treatable) form of brain cancer.  And someone else I know died yesterday from cancer.

It's scary.  And really sad.

I was all set to write a post about how sad and scared I have been/am, but then I thought better of it.

{image from HERE}

I can't let myself dwell in a dark and scary place.  Is life horribly scary and ridiculously unfair and at times extremely sad?  You bet.  But if we only focused on that, what an awful life it would be.  Plus, Phil gave me a small lecture Monday night about how I need to be more positive.  Like a LOT more positive.

Don't get me wrong, I am sure I will have a freak-out session today.  I'm sure I will have more than one.  I may even have a little bit of a Dr. Google relapse.  But I really just need to focus on positive things or I'm going to need some Prozac.  Stat.

So right now, I am going to focus on what is happening at this exact moment:

Cotton's Brittany traits are starting to really kick in and he is getting super cuddly.  It melts my heart.  I mean how could it not.  No joke, this just happened:

Plus I got my lazy betanya out of bed this morning at a nice early time so I could go grab a mocha from my favorite coffeeshop. 

And I think when my mind starts to wander to a place of worry, I am going to shift it and daydream about all of the things I want to do this fall. 

{image from Champagne Bubbles}

Gone Fishing

While we were camping, my brother decided he wanted Phil to go fishing with him and his boys (Jacob and David) and Jeffrey. 

{Isn't their family cute?!?}

{This isn't our group}

{This is}

{Jacob being a fisherman}

We went to a stocked reservoir and fished off the bank.  Since we were at the Oregon coast, it was very overcast and the fog rolled in quite a bit while we were fishing, but it was so nice.

{Watching Phil get the fishing poles ready and bait the hooks was super cute}

{I don't think that is what the net is for}

{This is what timeout looks like while fishing}

My favorite part of the outing was when Phil taught David (who is 4 years old) how to cast.  And this wasn't with a little kids pole.  This was Nick's grandpa's fishing pole.

Phil did a great job being patient with David and explaining to him how to hold the line and flip the reel and how you have to release the line with you throw the pole forward.  Watching David's little pudgy finger grab the line with his tongue stinking out in concentration was a definite Hallmark moment.  And he got it right away.  So cute.

{He got it}

Nobody caught anything, but it was still a very nice little outing.  And it was extremely peaceful and beautiful.

My eating weekend

My low-iodine diet ended Friday night.  So Saturday morning, I woke up and took my thyroid medicine right away so I could get to eating.  I basically spent the latter part of last week planning out what I wanted to eat.  Pathetic?  Of course.  But a definite reality.

I didn't want to go ridiculous.  Since I have only had fruit for 15 days, my stomach was basically the size of a peanut.  So I ate normal or small amounts of foods.  But here's a glorious display of my weekend spent eating.

You're welcome.

Coffee with cream

Phil and I split the Breakfast Crepe and the Peach Crepe

American Dream Pizza

State Fair Scones.  They are the most wonderful thing EVER.  I ate 2.

Sunday

Bacon Tomato and Avocado Scramble.  Hashbrowns.  And homemade sourdough toast.

Phil made me nachos

Sushi with Morgan.  You could almost smell the glorious iodine.  Fish, Shrimp, Seaweed, Soy Sauce.  Amazing-ness.

Not pictured:  My fair dinner (aka a corn dog) and my brownie and a glass of milk.

I have discovered during the diet that I apparently eat my feelings.  Comfort food is the name of the game.  I have also discovered that most of my comfort food includes cheese.  Hopefully I never develop a lactose problem because the alternative is apparently retail therapy.  My wallet can't take it.

Visions of Sugar Plums

I'm all scanned and counting down the seconds hours until I can eat normally again.  While I do not condone eating your feelings, that is pretty much exactly what I will be doing for the next week-ish while I wait anxiously patiently for my results.

In actuality, the diet isn't the worst thing ever.  If I could add a couple of things to it, I would have been dandy (like a little dairy.  Perhaps some cereal).  Two weeks isn't super bad.  I'm not jones-ing for food quite like I was last time.  However, there is a difference.  Last time I wasn't on my thyroid meds, so I have ZERO appetite plus enough lethargy that eating was a chore.  This time, I'm rocking a ridiculously medicated low TSH (thyroid talk) which means I have the appetite of a 15 year old boy.

I already informed Phil that we will be eating copious amounts of food this weekend, to which he was a little shocked.  I'm not usual glutenous, but he will oblige.  It is in his best interest.  It's either eat or pace a whole in the carpet.

But really I don't want to eat anything disgusting.  I'm not going to take a bacon cheeseburger, dip it in a milkshake and then throw some soy sauce and shrimp on it.  Although now that you mention it...

NO!  Some of the things I want are:

A sandwich
Something with mustard
Egg Salad
Rice
Cream Cheese
Creamy soup
Brownies with a glass of milk
Flour tortillas
Cheese

None of that is crazy.

Now, please excuse me.  I am off to daydream about pizza.